What to call the In-laws

My grandparents have always treated their sons and daughters-in-law like their own children, which I think is really sweet. Growing up, both my parents called each others' parents "mom" and "dad"-- it's what I'm used to, and it feels really weird to me when I hear friends calling their in-laws by their first names.
Here's my question. I adore my fiance's parents, they do feel like family, and I'd like to call them mom and dad, (which I plan to ask them about soon, to make sure they are comfortable with that. Right now I don't really call them anything) --however, two of my future hubby's siblings are already married, and their spouses call my future in-laws by their first names. I don't think that is necessarily because it's my in-laws preference; I think they would be fine being called either. If my mother and father-in-law don't mind my calling them mom and dad is it alright to do so, even though some of their other daughter/sons-in-law don't?

(Sorry if this is a repeat question, I haven't read everything ever posted to this site.)

What Mascara do you like?

I just never know what kind to buy. I am not married to any one brand, but I was just wondering what all of you like to use, and why?

Postpartum

What was your experience after having a baby? Did you experience baby blues? Did any of you have full-blown postpartum depression? What were the hardest things for you to adapt to in becoming a new mom?

Shopping online

Where do you go to shop online? And do you more often just look or do you actually buy? I personally look at Craigslist a lot, as well as etsy and Hyena Cart, and sometimes buy. But I look ALOT! What are you fav places to shop and/or look?

Should I be concerned?

I've been on my period for about two weeks now... maybe even more than that. I have a copper IUD, and this has never happened to me before. My period was a couple weeks late, and then it started and has been going on for quite some time. It started out very light for a week, then it got heavier, but not too heavy. I'm just getting a little worried that I've been bleeding for so long. I have insurance that starts on Monday, so I'll probably call the Dr then. Do you think it sounds like I should call my Dr though? I have no idea!

Very Upset

I am the person that wrote about my husband losing his job again. I just want you all to know that I thought most of your comments were rude. First of all when my husband lost his job the first time and his income fell so much. We did just fine. Yes I did go back to work but only part time. I work 4 days a week 6 hours a day. My question was should I get another job just in case it takes him a long time to find another one. My kids still do not go into day care. Never have never will. My grandma was willing to help so that we do not get behind while he finds another job. You all told me to live with in my means and sell our home our cars, to go live in a apartment so I have free Internet and T.V. Why would I sell our 1300 square feet home which you all called a huge" beautiful home". That is our only tax right off. It is cheaper that rent. We know how to live with in our means. We pay our bills just fine and are not behind on anything!! I just do not want to get behind while he is looking for another one.

My question is If your husband lost his job today how may of you could last 6 months with out no work, and no government assistance? And when he did get a job could you make it on 1/5 of what he was making before? Think about it. Next time don't be so quick to judge so hard.

Question about Stitches

I had something cut out of my leg on Tuesday and have three stitches there. Currently I have no band aid on it and it seems to be doing OK.

My questions is we are thinking of going to the beach (Oregon Coast) tomorrow. Do I need to be concerned about the sand or ocean water in regards to my stitches and everything healing ok? Advice? Thoughts?
Thanks!

Phentermine

I was reading the "help me lose it" post and I am in a somewhat similar situation as the OP of that post. My boss and 2 other women I work with have lost tons of weight using it. Naturally, I am curious if it is right for me and I am thinking about scheduling a doctor's appointment!

I was wondering what are the pros and cons of taking phentermine?
Does it give you long-term results as long as you exercise?
Are there side effects?

For any of you who have used it...tell me your thoughts.

skin

This is kind of a weird question but I'm going to ask anyway. The skin on the back of my arms is bumpy. We called it chicken skin when I was younger but I don't know the real name. I've seen a lot of girls with it and now I have it. It just started showing up (about a year ago) and I can't get it to go away. It's really grossing me out. Anybody know what the heck it is and how to make it go away?

What to do?

I am a stay at home mom with two boys, one 2 1/2 and the other 10 months. I play with them, we go places (park, mall, play dates, ect.) , but run out of ideas for activities to do with them at home.  I do play-doh, those kinds of things, but does anyone have any cute craft activities or something fun you do with your kids during the week (games, anything)? I need some ideas! Some may think what a bad mom I can't think of what to do with my kids, but I'm just bored with the activities we normally do. All ideas are greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Breast Augmentation

It seems from the plastic surgery post, that the majority of us on this blog would opt for breast augmentation, myself included, as something we would like done under certain circumstances. My question is this: Do you think you would want augmentation if it weren't so prevalent in our society today. In other words, if this were 20 years ago, do you still think you would want it? Do you feel pressure to have perky, full breasts because it seems that almost every other woman has them?

Your Photography Style

I was the second poster on the "PHOTOHOP" post a few questions back. My question is specifically to the third poster, but also to anyone else with a great opinion.

I had reccommeded a site because of the 'HOW-To's" that are offered on the blog and pictures of typical results by using the 'How-T0's" and I have learned a lot, being that I am pretty new to photoshop elements. The third poster said they didn't really care for the photos on that website, so I am asking what is your photography style? I personally love Urban photography. Do you have any reccommeded sites that I could check out, as I love to look at photography, any sites you could reccommend would be great. thanks

Jon & Kate + 8 Drama

Just wondering what everyone's take is on the whole "Jon and Kate +8" drama that is going on right now. At the store today I noticed the cover of US weekly with the headline "From Mom to Monster" (referring to Kate Gosselin).

My take: I'm not sure what to believe about Jon cheating on Kate. I think Kate is a complete witch. Totally bossy, controlling, and borderline abusive of Jon. However, I don't consider that grounds for cheating.

I feel really bad for their kids. I think the whole show should be cancelled. What a horrible idea to drag your kids through such a media parade. The oldest two girls are in school and are definitely old enough to catch what is going on here. Their life isn't a life - it's a TV show.

What do you think?

(for the record - I don't even watch the show. I used to, but stopped about a year ago. I'm not one of those people who is totally into celebrity lives or anything - this situation just interests me.)

one favorite

If you had to pick ONLY ONE...

What would you say your all-time favorite book is?

If You Could....

If you could have plastic surgery done for free, by the best plastic surgeon in the world, what would you have done? AND....if you could have any size of breast, what cup size would you choose?

stroller suggestions

i am looking for a stroller. That is easy to use/ push/ get out of the car/ not too bulky.

also what are your favorite brands for car seats. any suggestions would be awesome!!

-first time mom.

Stir the Pot

Somebody asked about some question that could have more interesting comments. Here is one.

What do you think of what is going on with Prop 8 in California?

What I think is the voters passed it and the state upheld it. Good for California.

Childhood Games

I know everyone played games as a child. What was your favorite game to play? I loved playing Hungry Hungry Hippos and Butts Up. If you don't know what Butts Up is, you definitely missed out. It was a great playground game that involved throwing a ball at a wall and at some poor sap's butt. Anyways, let me know what your favorite game was!


~CandyGal

FAM

So after 2 years and 3 different kinds of birth control pills, I'm done. I can't handle all the extra hormones in my body and their oh so lovely side effects. I've gained weight, lost my libido, have constant migraine headaches, nausea, and mood swings; I'm a peach let me tell you. So last night after talking to my husband about it we/I have decided it was time to stop. I went out and purchased this book. I'm about 50 pages in and am a little worried. Not only can we not have sex on my period (yes I realize that you can but we make a choice not to--it just grosses both of us out) but we have to use protection/ not have sex for the 8-10 days that I could get pregnant. We've never used protection and I'm not too excited about it. Should I just stick it out with the birth control and be miserable for the next 2+ years until we're ready to have kids or should I try the FAM (Fertility Awareness Method) and risk getting pregnant? I have to note that I do not want kids anytime soon. I love them and am excited for when we're ready. But want to wait quite awhile until we have some of our own. Have any of you been in this situation? I've tried to talk to my OBGYN about it but all they want to do is switch my birth control. I'm so worried and upset and unhappy with my own body. I have no idea what to do. Any advice is greatly appreciated.

interesting question?

I feel as though there's a lack of interesting questions on the blog lately (anyone else feeling that way?), so I'm hoping this stirs up some interesting conversation...

What have you done in your life that makes you feel horribly guilty?

Photoshop

What is the difference between Photoshop Elements and Photoshop CS3? For those of you who know what your doing :) what are the differences between the two and what does CS3/4 offer that Elements does not?

I have the opportunity to get a great discount on CS3, but don't know if it's a smart move as I have little to no experience in Photoshop. Thanks! Any advice would be greatly appreciated as I don't know that much about it, but I am excited to learn!

Amazing Concert-Can't go.

My husband bought tickets to the legendary Etta James concert in SLC at Red Butte Gardens on June 4th. She's the one that sings "At Last." I don't know what to do because he misunderstood my work schedule. I am unable to get the day off. I'm so mad I can't go because a picnic in the garden with the wonderful jazz music seems so romantic and wonderful! But, I guess I have to do what I have to do to keep my job in this awful economy. Do you guys have any ideas how I can resell them? Is it legal? I've never done it before.

How Often Do You...

Vacuum
Dust
Sweep/Mop
Clean the shower
Clean the toilet
Deep Clean Bathrooms
Wash Rugs
Wash Windows/Window Sills
Clean Baseboards/Walls
Move furniture and vacuum under/behind it
Clean out your fridge
Clean your oven

My hubby thinks I'm OCD and says I do this stuff way too often. So I thought I'd post here and see how often you do all of these things! Just copy and paste the list if you will, and let us know. Thanks! :)

Going Into Labor

Hey There! My sister in law is ready to have her baby. We were just wondering any tricks that have worked for other women to help jump start their labor. Her due date is June 1st. She is really low and last time she was checked she was dilated to a 3. Any suggestions are welcome!

P90X

Anyone try it?

Like it? Hate it?

Had great results?

Just curious. I've been researching it online and have only found positive feedback (other than you have to be dedicated and work hard - duh!).

Seems easy, but...

I'm trying to find black dress slacks for my almost 2 year old. I can't find them anywhere! Any suggestions?!

Grocery Smarts

I recently attended a class on Grocery Smarts. My family right now consists of myself, my husband and our 1 1/2 yr old son. I can't decide if our family would benifit from this or not. For those of you who are into the whole Grocery Smarts thing, please let me know what you think. Thanks!

Ideas for Very Young Children

I am in the nursery in my ward. The baby nursery that is! We have fourteen adorable little boys and girls between the ages of 18 months and 26 months old. Does anyone have any great ideas for activities that would work well with this age of children. Their attention spans are very short and we have to be prepared with several fun activities every week and they love it when we do something new!

For other teachers out there- our most recent "new" activity was a huge success. I took an old crib sheet and several small monkey toys with me. We had the kids put the monkeys on the sheet for bed, then we let them shake the sheet and bounce the monkeys all over while singing "Five Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed". We've also done it with stuffed puppies and bunny shaped balloons! They love it!

Now it's your turn--please share your great ideas!
Thanks!

A nice depressing song?

I need a good "break-up" song to listen to. This is how I'm feeling: I love you, yet I hate you, we've had a good several years together, but we have to move on because you broke my heart and I can't trust you... nothing seems to fit the mold right now! Any suggestions?

Pet Peeves

I think it would be fun to do a post on pet peeves. Also because one happened when I was reading this blog.

One of my pet peeves is when people drop the toilet seat and it makes that loud bang. As oppossed to setting it down gently. My husband and daughter do it CONSTANTLY! My daughter is 3 so she's probably dropping the toilet seat because she's playing with it and actually likes that bang sound. My husband is just lazy.

Anyone else?

How much?

I have a KitchenAid that I'm thinking about selling on craigslist.com. I'm just trying to figure out how much to post it for. I don't want to go too high or too low. How much would you be willing to pay for a used white KitchenAid that works perfectly, with all the attachments? I want to post it at a price that will make people feel they are getting a good deal, and that will make me feel like I'm getting my money's worth. Thanks!

Giving Birth...to go Natural or Not?

I am pregnant with my second child. My first baby I did have an epidural, I loved my birthing story. The reason I chose to have an epidural is because I wanted to feel as comfortalbe as possible. I wanted to really enjoy my birthing experience.

Now, I'm open to the idea of having my next child naturally (in a hospital, home birthing is not an option for me). The reason I would like to try natural child birth is because I'm curious. I want to know what it feels like, I want to know what it's like to be in control, etc.

So my question is for those who did give birth naturally, what were your expriences? What natural birthing techniques did you use (hypnobirthing, etc.)? Is is really worth it in the end? Are the drugs from an epidural really that dangerous for the baby?

I'm just newly pregnant, my first doctors appointment is in a few weeks so I will ask questions then, but I want to here all of your opinions and expriences. Thank you!!!

ED

I'm not sure how to feel about this situation I'm currently going through. Here's the details: My husband and I didn't have sex until after we were married. We have been married for a few years, and our sex life has been... :-(

I have had sex with other people in my past, but my husband has not, so I know what sex is like with other people besides just him. The reason why I say our sex life is not good has to do with his "member". We have had tons of experiences where he's had issues with being hard. This has been going on our whole marriage. It's been very depressing. We've researched this issue and tried lots of different things. He recently went to the doctor and was diagnosed with ED. When he takes a male enhancement drug (he's tried them all), the sex is still not very good. We now don't have sex very often... on the weekends at the most.

It basically goes like this: we don't have sex til the weekend. When we do, he spends the whole time trying to get hard. We start having sex even though he's not that hard. I endure very awkward sex with a half hard penis, he starts to get hard but as soon as he does he has to orgasm... so it's basically over at that point.

I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. What do I do? Our sex life depresses me. And it takes its toll on other aspects of our marriage. Any advice?

Refinishing Furniture

I really want to refinish my kitchen table, but I don't have a clue how to do it. I think I just want to paint it black. I am just wondering if anyone has any tips or advice. I am not sure if I need to sand it first and if I need to sand off the old paint completely or just the shiny seal. I am wondering if there is a spray paint I can use or if I need to stain it and what kind of seal I need to put on it after. As you can see I am clueless!

Thanks for any advice.

Not sure what to do...

Out of the blue a few weeks ago, my sister announced that she is getting divorced.

They have been married for 4 years (temple sealing) and there are children involved.
Her reasoning for the divorce is that her husband is too much of a "mama's boy", and that he expects too much of her...She works full time and he expects her to cook dinner and do all the house cleaning since that is how he was raised. He spends a lot of time on Saturdays, days off, etc., with his family and she feels left out. I have to say that from what I've seen as an outsider looking in, these are all valid points. I would be mad and hurt too...But divorce??? She would definitely tell me if he had cheated on her or been abusive, but she said none of that has gone on.

She kicked him out of the house a few weeks ago and claims she is happier now than ever before. She says she actually still loves him, but doesn't think he'll ever really change. I suggested to my sister that they try counciling out, or that she at least give it some time before she files for divorce. But she says she's done, and she thinks she'll be happier single. (This is actually her second divorce, so I'm beginning to believe her.) I figured it's her life - let her do with it what she wants.

Well, last night her husband called my husband. He was really upset, desparate, and didn't know who else to call. He was on the verge of tears as he explained to my husband how he knows he has made mistakes and he wants to change, but my sister won't even talk to him. He says he still loves her and is totally willing to change everything he has done wrong, and he wants to tell her that and basically beg for another change, but she won't hear him out.

Now let me just say here, that I haven't particularly loved this brother-in-law. I think he's a grouch and has a quick temper, but he definitely has some redeeming qualities as well. My sister isn't exactly the easiest person to be around either, so I think they are the perfect match.

I think my sister may be making the biggest mistake of her life by getting yet another divorce. I feel bad for her children, and the toll this is taking on them. She is being so stubborn and I don't know how I can get through to her, or if I should even try. I'm planning on calling her tonight and telling her about how her husband called mine and what he said. I just don't really know how to approach the situation or what to do. I really don't want to be involved in this whole mess, but at the same time it's like I'm watching her ruin her and her kids' lives and it's hard to not say something. Its as if she was about to stick her arm in a garbage disposal and I just have to keep my mouth shut! If anyone has any insights or advice, I would really appreciate it. Thanks!

Kindle

I love to read and I read a lot of books that I enjoy but I don't really want to buy. I also hate reading ebooks on my computer and I have to wait forever to get books from the library. Has anyone used the Kindle from Amazon.com? I'm very interested in getting it but it's kind of pricey and if it's like reading on the computer I'd rather keep the money. Thanks!

Breast-feeding Etiquette

So I am expecting my first baby pretty soon and I plan on breast-feeding; however, I've never really been around anyone who breastfed, so I need all the help I can get. What do you do in a large group setting? Do you go into another room or have a bottle with pumped milk? What about with a group outside, like at a park? Do I go sit in my car to feed her? Or do people even care if you breast-feed in front of them?

Also when did you introduce formula after you had started breast-feeding? Is there a certain brand that works best as a supplement to breast milk. I don't know how much of a milk supply I will be able to store before going back to work and I'm not sure how often I will be able to pump when I go back to work. If you have any other breast-feeding tips or tricks please post them too. Thanks!

American Idol Winner

Kris Allen won American Idol tonight. I was surprised and pleased. Who did you want to win? Did Kris deserve it?

I can't eat at Carls Jr???

A while ago my Stake President asked our Stake to not eat at Carls Jr due to their obscene commercials. I thought it was very odd and was shocked that there would be such intrusive council. I shrugged it off, but soon realized that almost everyone in my ward and other wards weren't eating at Carls Jr anymore- due to the council. I just thought this was ridiculous and didn't really follow the advise. But recently my Bishop has been asking about it in temple recommend interviews. I say that because he asked me, and my husband said he asked him too- both happened recently. My bishop advised us to not eat there anymore, but we talked to him honestly about it and said he had been eating there. He didn't deny us a recommend- but it was like he was letting us by this one time or something. I think this is obsurd! I honestly don't want to stop eating at Carls Jr and I don't think the Church should be that controlling, even if it came from the prophet. Has anyone else heard of this in their wards???

HELP ME LOSE IT

Okay so since last summer I have been eating well, I exercise regularly and am also a musical theater performer (so I dance my heart out in shows a lot), I don't drink pop...I feel like I do everything that most people do to lose weight. I HAVE LOST NOTHING in 10 months.

I have had my thyroid checked...normal. I am on a birth control with no weight gain associated.

I am wondering if there is some kind of SAFE supplement or pill I can take to HELP ME out a little bit? It seems like nothing I do is working. I need some advice and ideas.

If you are someone who has a difficult time losing weight, I need to know what you have done to make it happen!! With my height and body type, i think I need to lose about 40 pounds to be considered average.

What are your thoughts?

Stay At Home Wife

Are any of you out there stay at home wives? Not mom's, just wives. What do you do with all your time and do you ever feel bad or looked down upon because you aren't working and don't have kids?

I ask because I am about to graduate and I have ZERO job prospects. I chose to do something that I LOVE but unfortunately there's next to no market for right now. My husband makes plenty of money and I don't need to work in order for us to live comfortably, and he even expressed that he wouldn't care at all if I wanted to take some time off and stay home for a while. I never even considered that but it would be kind of nice to have an always-clean-house and dinner always made. But I almost feel like that'd be kind of a cop-out and that I should keep looking for a job since we aren't planning on having kids anytime soon. What do you all think?

Margarine incognito?

What is the difference between Margarine, Blue Bonnet, Imperial? I ask because when I bake, I always use what I think is "margarine", but today, I noticed that Imperial and Blue Bonnet do not even have the word Margarine on it, so I am wondering are they all different? The same? Should I just be sticking with butter to avoid any problems? What do you all use/why etc...? This may seem dumb to some of you out there, but I really am wondering if there is a difference, or if it is something like "Kleenex" vs. "tissue". Thanks in advance for humoring me with your time.

Being Verbally abused

How do you know if you are being abused verbally/emotionally? I never really thought about it until just recently after reading some comments on here. What are some signs/ways that people abuse you this way?

I know this may sound like a dumb question, but it isnt as obvious as being physically abused.

Chores

What would be some reasonable chores for a 4 year old and a 6 year old?

Am I asking too much?

I'm the one who posted the "blame for the affair" question, and here's another (with explanation)...

My husband met the woman at work. They work at a very large place with multiple areas so at this point they don't really risk seeing each other, but there's always the chance. The vast majority of the people who work there and know my husband and/or this woman know about their relationship. They think of my husband as "the guy who cheated on his wife while she was pregnant, then home with a newborn." Some people ignore the fact that it happened because he gets there and gets the job done, others think "cool, you scored with an older woman!" (she's 11 years older).

If things are to work out between us, I want my husband to rise above. I want him to be known as a good, Christian man who works hard to provide for his family, not an adulterer sick enough to leave his newborn baby home to go off and cheat on her mother.

He has a very marketable skill so he could easily find a new job even with the current economy. We'd be sure he was employed with a new company before he put in his notice, so:

Is it asking too much for him to quit his job?

Need a deodorant that works!

I know this is a really lame question...BUT

I need to find a deodorant that works {for women}! I just got home from church and I am seriously soaked! Gross, I know! Please share what works best for you.

blame for affair

So, my husband had an affair. It started out emotional and one thing led to another... I was talking to his sister online the other day and these are exact copy-and-pastes from some of the things she said:

"what [husband] did is very uncharacteristic of who he is, and it makes me think, that something was missing in your marriage"

"I am universally under the belief that when a man acts as [husband] did it is because his wife was withholding something he needed"

Then she goes on to basically blame me for his behavior and says all sorts of horribly unkind things to me... I am stupid to think she's being a b*tch or are there others out there who feel this way?

How old is too old?

My barely 2 year old son showers with my husband or I almost every day. He loves it, and its and easy and convenient way to get the job done all at once. For the most part he ignores our nudity but sometimes he will point and say "pee-pee". Other than that, he doesn't seem to be too terribly interested in our bodies.

I'm just wondering, at what age should we stop letting him shower with us, or see us naked in general? He sees me getting dressed or changing all the time. Does gender make a difference? For example, is the age limit of him seeing my husband naked different than seeing me naked? I don't want to be TOO prudish, but I also don't want to traumatize him.

My older sister has two daughters who are 10 and 8, and she changes in front of them and actually bathes in front of them (while they are getting ready or whatever) all the time. I'm not sure what to think of that. I remember seeing my mom naked a few times growing up and I always felt so awkward about it. I think because of that, I'm extra cautious about stuff like that.

Anyway - any thoughts or insights are appreciated! Thanks in advance!

Fund raiser/Yard Sale

We are looking to do a fund raiser/yard sale so my nephew can go to the scout jamboree next year. We are thinking of having it over memorial day weekend. We are wondering if this would be a good time to have it? Also has anyone had yard sales? Can you give any advise as to when would be best to have it, where to list it (besides Craig's List), and if you can give any other ideas for fund raisers? Thanks!

What would you do?

Last week my friend and I attended a baby shower for a good friend of ours. We decided to go in on a gift together and agreed to each chip in around $20 dollars. It's the busy season at my work (and my friend doesn't work) so she offered to go pick something up for us. I told her I'd bring cash when I saw her at the shower.
When we met, I handed her twenty five bucks (thinking I was being generous), and she said that she went a "little over" our discussed amount. The gift she got was $112 bucks! I was floored, and she went into this whole spill about how our pregnant friend "deserves" a great gift, yada yada. I didn't know what to do ( we were AT the shower) and I just said, "I'll get you the rest later."
Now I'm really bugged, because my friend and her husband are really wealthy so things like this aren't a big deal to them. I'm supporting a husband in college and working at a job where I don't get paid squat. So, not only did she go against our agreement, but she knows I don't have $50-60 bucks to drop on a freaking baby shower gift.
I tried to talk to her about this and she got really defensive and said that I was taking advantage of her "money" by having my name on that card when I only paid $20. I tried calmly to tell her that we AGREED on $20 a person and if she goes against it, then that's her problem. Now it's a huge deal and I don't know what do to. Should I suck it up and give her $35 more bucks or stick to my guns??

Intimacy

Have any of you had issues with the closeness or frequency of sex in a relationship with your spouse or significant other? I am a very physical and sexual person and enjoy that part of our relationship much more than my spouse does. I think that the physically intimate part of a relationship is spiritual, bonding, and wonderful in every way, so I have a difficult time understanding why my spouse doesn't seem to want more of that in our relationship. It's important to me and I believe a fair amount of time and attention should be given to it. If any of you have experienced this situation, how have you worked through it? What are some good ideas to become more balanced as a couple? Was he/she able to step it up or did you have to step it down?

Company and Food

My husband and I moved a few months ago for a new job. We now live in a much more expensive area and it isn't always easy to make ends meet. We also live several states away from where we started.

We have some of our dear friends coming to visit. I don't know how it happened as in did we ask them or did they ask us. I just don't remember. What I know is they had frequent flier miles and so it isn't costing them much if anything to come. I also know that they don't have a terrible lot of money between them (married couple).

My problem is the food situation. We don't go out to eat much because our money is needed in more important places. Feeding extra people cost extra money. They will be here with us for almost a week. What is expected of me as a good hostess? Am I to supply all the food for the entire time? It's going to be quite costly to feed that many people. I know if we eat out once or twice, they will pay for themselves, but we can't go out to eat much more than that while they are here. So what should I do? Should I ask for help with the groceries? I hate to do that.

So should I say something? What about easy meals that makes a lot for a little? Any suggestions in that direction? I do plan on going to Costco and getting a few things that will make big meals within our budget, but I think I need some help. Got any help? Suggestions? Anything??

What do You watch on TV?

I really love primtime television and am sad that it is finale week. In fact 2 of my fave shows are ending the series this year and another one ends next year.

So I need some new shows. What do you watch? What would you reccommend? Why? What stations do your fave shows broadcast on?
thanks

Help! I'm still in love with an ex!

I have been married for a little over 7 years and I absolutely adore my husband! I love him with all my heart. However, I have an ex that I ALWAYS think about. I try not to, but he always seems to creep in there. When I first got married, everything was great and I never thought about the ex, but about a year and a half later, I all of a sudden found myself constantly thinking about him and wanting to see him again, and it's been pretty bad, on and off, ever since. I love my husband more than I've ever loved anyone including this ex, so why can't I get him off my mind? He's not the only ex I have, and I never find myself thinking excessively of the others. So, why him? I seriously feel like I'm completely infatuated with him. It's really bothering me. Am I alone here or does anybody else have this problem? How can I get him off my mind? I'm seriously scared that someday I might run into him, and if he still has the same feelings, I'm really scared that I might be too weak to stay away from him. I know that sounds terrible and I really don't want that to happen, but I don't know what to do.

MONKEY-ER

Firstly, I just want to say that I thought it was HILARIOUS sometime last winter when the subject of Monikers came up and people kept calling them Monkiers. Made me laugh.

Anyway...simple question.

What does your Moniker mean? Where did you come up with it? Do you change it ever? Do you ever post anonymously even though people on this blog know you as "Moniker lover" or "Blog Biotch"? (haha...just kidding). Kinda.

OVERREACTION?

So I would like to know what everyone thinks, because I brought this up to my husband and he thought I was pathetic and self centered. So every year my husband always does something for me for mothers day, usually a nice gift, and a card with something really sweet written in it. I guess I've always taken it for granted. Well this year no card (he told me what my gift was so I knew there was no actual gift that day), I was okay without the card, just a little shocked. The next day I get on facebook where my husband and I share our account and I see a old friend of his wrote a little thank you on our page so I thought I would check out what he wrote. It was a small three lined note about what a great mother she is and how she's the most involved mother he knows. I was a little hurt that he went out of his way to write and tell her how great she is, and then I didn't even get that. My husband did end up getting me a card after all, but said that he never got the chance to write in it. Am I in the wrong to be a little hurt?

Teacher Gifts

As the school year is nearing the end, I am curious what an appropriate gift for your child to give to their teacher is. My child is only in Preschool, and I don't want the gift to be extravagant. Plus, I want to keep the cost LOW. Any suggestions?

Here's a few ideas I'm considering:
1- Gift card to Barnes and Noble.
2- A children's book to contribute to the classroom library.
3- Gift card to Bath and Body Works.
4- Homebaked goods.

Your Child's Money

When I was a little girl I was always acting. Local theatre at first, then local commercials, ZCMI print ads then on to some national commercials and pilots and such. We lived in Salt Lake City, so you know, we were pretty limited to what went on at Osmond Studios, but I worked a lot. Enough to get into SAG and AFTRA and all that. My parents took all my money. All of it. Sure, we suddenly got a new house, my Dad's student loans were paid off and we were debt free, but I got a new Huffy bike. That's pretty much it. They took the rest. In a way I can see how it benefited my family, don't get me wrong. My parents were the ones that took me to acting classes, drove me all over town, paid for headshots, etc.. so I certainly think they deserved to be compensated to some extent. However, by the time I was ready for college, the money was pretty much gone. We moved to Southern Utah when I was a teenager and my parents were unwilling to drive me to Vegas or SLC for work, so I said goodbye to my professional child acting career (and that's okay with me as well). I paid my way through school on an acting scholarship and headed to LA a few years later. Here I am in LA, happily married and working and acting and loving it, but sometimes I can't help but feel a little ticked off. I once told my mother that I would have been happier living in our little house in South Salt Lake as a child so I could have used my money to pay for UCLA, which was my dream, or even MY OWN house once I became old enough. BUT, history is history, and that's in the past, I suppose.

Well, my kiddo is a natural. I have in no way pushed her into acting, but living in Los Angeles it often finds people and it has recently found her. Now SHE is making money at it, much more than I ever did as a child (or do now, for that matter) and I am not sure what to do.

What is fair?

I have been putting it all in her Coogan Account, which is a special account set up for child performers that is mandated by California state law and the money cannot be drawn out until the child is 18 and only the child can draw it. Even if there was some big tragedy and we NEEDED the money, we couldn't touch it. I belive the law regarding Coogan Accounts passed because of Gary Coleman, true story. The law says we have to put 15% in there, but thus far we have put 100% in there. HOWEVER, her agent takes a nice percentage of her earnings right off the top, and her manager gets a good chunk, too.

Is it ridiculous of me to think that I deserve a percentage? If so, what would the percentage be? We have worked hard in LA for YEARS, and still don't own a house. We drive used cars and are by no means frivolous. Its not like we would steal her money to buy a mansion on the hill, but is there a happy medium?

Any thoughts on either end of the scope are greatly appreciated.

Divorce

Where do you stand on divorce, are you for or against it? Do you think a couple should only get divorced if there is cheating involved.
The reason I ask is this: I am LDS and have been married for a couple years. We were married in the temple. I feel like our relationship has taken a turn for the worse and I dont feel the same way about him as I used to. I know many of you will encourage me to seek marriage counceling but I dont see how they can MAKE me love him again. Although I am sure they have great advise. Any suggestions. Is it wrong to get out of a marriage simply because I feel I dont love him anymore? I havent ever cheated on him and never would cheat. I have been thinking of other guys but would never act on it.
Thanks

Turned on by gay men doing it

Ok, I need to know if this is weird. I get turned on by thinking about gay men. Thinking about two guys doing it turns me on. When I get the chance, I like to watch gay porn. When my husband and I are intimate, I like to think of him with another guy. I'm really turned on by men, and I'm wondering if I like thinking of this because it's just twice the amount of what I like. Like, it's not weird for a guy to watch two girls getting it on... so is this necessarily weird???

Blog rings/groups?

My sister has a blog about a psychiatric disorder she suffers from and is looking for blog groups/rings she can list it with. Does anyone know any blog groups like that? How about ways to find blog rings? Thanks!

Painting Tips

I have a few painting projects in mind for the summer but I need all the advice/ tips I can get.

When painting furniture do I always need to sand/prime? What is your favorite kind of paint and primer? any tips on how to make things easier? Should I use a sealer?

Weird question can I paint dishes and then still eat on them? what is the best paint for this? and is it safe?

really any advice is appreciated!

Butter cream Frosting

Ok so you know the really good cakes you can get from the grocery store? Well Ive been trying to copy the butter cream frosting recipe for a long time but just cant get it right. I even asked at the store what the recipe is and they said they just buy in bulk ready made so my question is does anyone know the recipe? Im talking the grocery store butter cream frosting recipe!

everyday stuff

What is an everyday thing that you love and are REALLY thankful for? Not like family and religion and love and blah blah...(though that stuff is all really great!)

I just mean like...stuff you probably take for granted but might not be able to live without!

For example: I don't think I could function without my BlackBerry. I am so grateful for cell phones!!!
Also, toothpaste. What if you had to brush your teeth with straight WATER? Yuck. I heart toothpaste.

What about yOUU??

Video

How do you post a video directly to your blog? I have a youtube video that I want to show on my blog, not as a link. Thanks!

HOLD YOUR TONGUE!

I want to know how many of you are like me in this aspect... I CANNOT keep my mouth shut! I consider myself a very kind, caring and compassionate person. However, I think my mouth is much quicker than my brain. So often I say REALLY inappropriate or rude things without REALLY meaning to say them..

Mild example: I work for a law firm. The head attorney I work for is really sarcastic and teases me all the time. I guess we have a less-than-professional relationship in the fact that I am only a few years older than his oldest child and I think he sees me in a daughter-like way. One day he was teasing me and making fun of something I did, and, without thinking, I said: "Okay, you are SUCH A BUTTHEAD!" To my boss. Seriously? MY BOSS. I was mortified. He seriously didn't know what to say. I felt stupid. Of course, it was fine because he thought it was funny and had yet another reason to make fun of me but really...who DOES that? Another time, after he said something like "you kinda have to bang it a little hard" (referring to his filing cabinet drawer that I couldn't get to close) I accidentally said - under my breath, thankfully - "that's what she said" (from the Office)...he was like: "I didnt hear you...what did you say?" And I was like "...oh...nothing...heh.." Whaat the crap you guys?

Also..I say things out loud that kind of make me sound insane. For example: I have a cupboard door (actually it's a lazy susan-type spinny deal) that WILL NOT stay shut. I shut it, and it slides open no matter what. One day I was putting groceries away and it was driving me crazy and I screamed: "IF THIS SLIDES OPEN ONE MORE TIME I AM GOING TO BURN THIS HOUSE DOWN AND SLIT MY WRISTS!"
Umm...psychotic much? I know. My husband considered calling the police. Anyway...I just say things without thinking about how people are going to respond to what I say...

Does anyone else do this? Have you ever said something really embarrassing?

NEW CAMERA

So my camera has decided to die on me, at least it was after some birthday parties. Anyways I am needing to buy a new one and am asking for any suggestions. I don't need something fancy and I am wanting to spend no more than $150. I just need something that is good quality and a good price. What do you all have or what would you recommend?

Thanks for any ideas!

Potty Training

Help! We're trying to potty train our daughter. She will tell us when she needs to go to the potty, but when she sits on it, she never goes. Instead, she just holds it forever. Have any of you dealt with kids who knew when to go but just wouldn't go in the toilet? Do you have any tips?

Mother's Day

What did you get?

for mother's day

What is the one thing you would really want for mother's day if money, time and resources were limitless??

BedBugs

My next door neighbor went on a trip and came home with bed bugs. She has called the exterminator and their solution is a hard one with bagging up everything, dry cleaning everything, and moving furniture and such. They are in the process of starting the treatments but I was hoping somebody had some experience they could share that might make this easier. She has 3 small children and dealing with this is going to be harder on her than is very fair. There is little I can do to help because we don't want to get infected with them either.

Any useful advise to help?

How Do I Get Dog Poop Out of my Carpet?

You can imagine my surprise when I came downstairs this morning to find several little piles of doggy diarrhea all over my living room carpet, and one pee stain. Apparently my dog didn't feel well during the night! She is 4 years old and house trained, so this is not something I have ever had to deal with. If it were solid poop I would just pick it up and scrub the area with some sort of pet stain remover....but this is LIQUID PILES OF DOG POOP, in perfect little circles all over the floor in the corner.

No, ripping out and replacing the carpet is not an option at this point, unfortunately.

SO, what do I do to clean this up? Do I wait until its hardened and peel it up and soak it with vinegar and steam clean it? Do I scrape it off now and get some heavy duty resolve carpet cleaner for pet stains? Any suggestions are very much appreciated.....

THANKS!

Period questions

I have a few questions about Aunt Flow... (periods)
#1 Do you use tampons, pads or other? And why?
#2 Have you ever got TSS? How bad was it?
#3 Does anyone else ever feel like they have a hundred pound weight hanging from down there?
...Just curious...

where did it go?

Is it just me or did the 'what celebrity would you knock out' question randomly disappear??
I thought that one was really funny. Just a little confused...

My bro

I am preparing to bless (LDS) my son (first child) in about a month. My husband and I have decided who we want in the "circle" with the exception of my brother. My brother is a good guy, and up until about two years ago, a very active member of the church. He has since "fallen away" but still holds up the facade of being an active worthy member. As far as most of our extended family is concerned, they don't really know that he is actively doing things that make him unworthy to participate in certain ordinances. I know what he is doing and that it is not conducive the the lifestyle I chose to live. HOWEVER, we don't butt heads and we love each other very much. We rarely talk about his "bad choices" and our relationship is healthy.

My husband is 100% against letting my brother be in the circle. I am too, but think I should ask my brother and let him make the decision. I don't want to "assume" (or judge) that he isn't worthy to be in the circle. The worry is that, since most of my family doesn't know what he does, I'm afraid my brother will say "yes" and be in the circle anyway just to "save face." What should I do? I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I want the circle to be one of faith and worthiness.

Pregnancy Diet and Exercise

I am currently pregnant and wondering how much those of you who are pregnant exercise? Or how much did you exercise when you were pregnant? What types of exercise do/did you do?

I walk a couple of miles about four or five days a week, and I eat really healthy. I will admit that I have a treat like ice cream or cookies a couple of times a week. I am 6 months along and I have already gained about 25 pounds!!! I was not under or over weight to begin with, just average. I'm freaking out about it and I feel like I am gigantic.

I guess I'm just wanting to kind of see a "marker" as to how much exericse other women do while they are pregnant. I'm not worried about losing the weight after the baby is born (this is my second and I had no problem the first time, and nursing helped.) But I don't want to look like an elephant for the next 3-3 1/2 months.

Any tips or help is very welcomed and appreciated!

Separation

Have any of you separated from your spouse (meaning living apart)? If so, how long, was it helpful, did you end up getting back together or divorcing, did you see or talk to each other during the separation, any details would be helpful. I realize this is a very personal question, so just share whatever you're comfortable with. Thanks!

Home based jobs

Hi everyone. I am a stay at home mom and would like to make a little more money but don't want to send my baby to a babysitter. I was wondering if anyone knows of any good/real jobs not scams that can be done from home. I have heard of a few and actually applied for a couple but was not accepted. Any help?

My toddler's sleeping habits

My little 18 month old boy has been waking up between 5:55-6:20 lately, and it is really starting to wear on me. Throughout his life, he's kind of gone through stages where he'll do this, but it usually doesn't last more than a couple days, but this has been going on for a couple weeks now, and it seems to just be getting earlier and earlier on average. My husband and I are taking turns getting up with him, but it's still really hard, especially because I'm not a morning person at all. The thing is, I know that he's still tired, because he's actually fallen asleep like a half an hour later in our arms for another 30 minutes or so (a couple times), but if you move a muscle, he wakes right back up. And just so you know, we have tried just keeping him in his bed, but it's very obvious to us when he has waken up for good, and there's no way he's going back to sleep. We also tried putting up a blanket over his window one night hoping that it was just because it's getting lighter outside earlier, and that didn't help at all. Anybody have any advice on how I can get his biological clock on a later wake up time, or do I just need to get used to this? Oh, and fyi, he goes to bed at about 8:30-9:00 every night, although, I've also tried putting him to bed later, and that didn't help either.

Wii Fit

I'm looking at getting a Wii Fit. What are your opinions of this system? Did it help you to lose weight? What accessories would your recommend? I'm a mom who used to be very active, but working full-time and then doing all my home stuff doesn't leave me much time for the workouts I once had. If I could get a good workout while staying at home, I think I could begin whipping my post-baby butt back into shape. Is this a pipe dream with the Wii Fit, or something I could actually do?

kids question

Have you ever secretly hoped your child didn't make a team or group they were trying out for? We try so hard to support all the things that our children are doing, however sometimes it's exhausting. Our oldest wanted to try out for an athletic team. We supported their decision to try out, but secretly hoped they didn't make it as the time committment is A LOT! We found we really couldn't honestly pray to have the lord help this child at the try out. Turns out they did not make the team and we (mom & dad) are relieved, but feeling guilt for not being more supportive. This child is now devastated. We have pointed out some of their other talents and offered to give some additional support to those talents, but the guilt of not being more supportive during the try out process is still there. Anyone ever struggled with this?

Baby Etiquitte

WHAT IS IT with people thinking it is OK to stick their fingers in your baby's mouth and let them suck on them?!?! I am not talking about an older baby. It would be one thing if you said "Hey, my baby is getting a tooth, want to feel" ~ Im talking about a brand new baby! I dont care if you are my BEST friend or a complete stranger, that is just something you DO NOT do! Why do people think this is ok? Have any of you ever done this, and if so, what made you think that it was acceptable. Has anyone experienced this, and if so, how did you handle it. What did you say? I have been nice about it and made excuses of why I dont want them to do it, but now that it has happened more than once, I am ready to be flat out rude! It is rediculous!!!

Cake Decorating

I know this question isn't very exciting, but I'm asking anyway. I have really been wanting to get into cake decorating. I was just wondering if anyone knew where I could get a good, but fairly cheap, cake decorating kit (tips, bags, etc.) I have looked everywhere. I don't want to buy everything individually because I think it might get a little expensive. If anyone has any ideas, please let me know. Thank you!!!


~I Love Candy!!

To tan or not to tan

After reading the "tan-through bathing suit" post, it made me remember a question that I've been longing to ask...

I know one commenter mentioned a Neutrogena tanning lotion, but I was wondering what other tanning lotions are good? I haven't used any in years because I'm still scarred from the orange mess it made of my skin that wouldn't come off.

Do you know of a good tanning lotion that is easy to apply and low maintenance?

Do you REALLY believe?

As it is mostly LDS who monitor this blog, this seems a relevant question: Do you REALLY believe? Would you give up your life in defense of the church, as is required by your temple covenants? Would you give up all your possessions to live the law of consecration? Would you live polygamy if asked by church leaders? Would you pack up and move to Missouri?

Full disclosure: I am ex-mormon(my own choice), but think that the church offers many good things, including fellowship, a foundation for good values, etc. I know many who don't really think of the doctrine, but are truly devoted to the church for "secular" reasons. When I was LDS I would often wonder how many really would "go old school" if asked, and how many were there for the culture.

Please be respectful, I am not trying to stir the pot. It has just been a really long time since a prophet asked anything hard of the members, and I wonder how many "die-hards" there really are.

Holding out for your dream job

I have a neighbor who has been unemployed for almost 2 years. There've been a few times when we've known of a decent position available somewhere and mentioned it to him, but he let us know last time we did that that he isn't willing to apply for anything that's not in the banking industry, which is what he used to do. Now I can completely understand looking for a job in your field of expertise for awhile, but two years?? He's now in debt worse than you can imagine, hasn't paid any child support, and sponges off the church's welfare system. So it frustrates me that MY tithing money pays for people like him to sit around being snobby about what type of job they get. Work at McDonalds for heaven's sake - at least it's money coming in, and then continue to apply for jobs in your field, WHILE working somewhere else. By the way, it doesn't really frustrate me that my tithing goes to stuff I don't agree with - I realize that it doesn't matter what gets done with the money, just that I am faithful in paying it. I just didn't want to start a sub-argument over that. :) Anyway, my neighbor is just one of MANY people I know who refuse to get a lesser-paying job and just remain unemployed. Can anyone help me understand this mentality? I know someone in the salary post mentioned that her husband used to make really good money and had to settle for a job that paid a lot less. I just wanted to hug her, and him for that matter, and say, "Way to be." So, those of you who are holding out for your dream job (or your husband), can you give us any insight? And let's just establish up front that I am mean and judgemental to even dare ask a question like this.

Gallbladder surgery

Has anyone had their gallbladder removed due to excessive stones? I am in my 20's, healthy, and pregnant when my DR found lots of gall stones in my gall bladder while doing a routine ultrasound. He was absolutely floored I haven't had an attack yet, but wants my gallbladder out immediately after giving birth.
Have any of you had this done? How long was the surgery and the recovery? Was it really painful? Any DR/surgeon you went to that you loved? (I live in Utah county).

Thanks!

MY SURGERY - AN UPDATE

Hey, to all those of you (Tiger Lily, TexasMom, chickety, etc.) who were talking to me about my surgery..this is Moto. And I had it done yesterday. I am in bed, ridicudlously SORE and groggy..very drugged up (as in 1000 mg of vicodin every 5 hours) and very bored laying in bed. You guys asked for an update so here it is!

Please forgive me if I make a bunch of typos or dont make much sense. I am loving my narcotics as of right now. I also apologize to others for this not being a question...its the only way to let these people know how it went. Please excuse my misuse of this blog for the time being. They asked me to give an update after I had it done, and so here I am!

I have been laying in bed since yesterday morning watching Gossip Girl, drinking more water than I have in my entire life and therefore peeing every 3o minutes (literally) and popping pills every 4-5 hours. Thanks for your help in preparing me for this surgery..definitely not as scary as I thought it was going to be! Thank you! Hopefully things will be better for me from here on out..as soon as I am fully recovered...again, thanks!


PS...if someone could just hop on over to my house and fix the pillows under my feet, that would be great :)

Do we really want answers?

What is the best format for a blog discussion?  I’ve just realized why comments on blogs irritate me so much.  It’s not because of rude or crass bloggers.. it’s the format itself.  For example, here is a mock outline of “comment flow” in response to a question or article:

Commenter 1 – makes a really good point

Commenter 2 - makes a really good new point

Commenter 3 – responds with an untrue or purposely biased statement (no responsibility when anonymous, right?)

Commenter 4 – replies to Commenter 3 with support

Commenter 5 – replies to Commenter 3 with no support, just a snide remark

Commenter 6 – replies to Commenter 3 with the same support as Commenter 4

Commenter 7 – replies to Commenter 4

Commenter 8 – replies to Commenter 2 with same stuff as Commenter 4 and 6

Commenter 9 – replies to Commenter 1

Commenter 10 – replies to all by saying, “Why are you all rehashing the same stuff? Obviously this reflects an incorrect bias of the commenters. What did you all do? Call each other to get everyone to comment?”

Commenter 11 – makes a very good new point

Commenter 12 – replies to Commenter 10 and rehashes the same points made by Commenter 4 through 9

----------- 

As I read the comments, I may ultimately agree with Commenter 1, but I find myself becoming sympathetic to Commenter 3, not because of the strength or insight to their comments (let’s pretend they’re just plain wrong), but because the flurry of identical responses gives the impression of an attack. 

The point is, coordinated or not, Commenters 5 through 9 either didn’t read the comments before theirs OR they thought they could explain better. Either way, these are egotistical perspectives (i.e. that one can come into a conversation and without understanding its direction attempt to take it over OR that if you slightly adjust someone else’s rehashed argument, YOU will ultimately convince the antagonist).   We've really seen this flow recently in the swinger discussion. 

So, are blogs like this really about getting an answer?  I don’t think so, because the question is often answered fully in the first couple comments.  Or should everyone post their answers, even if identical so that the correct answer will be revealed by “consensus.”

So what is the best format?